In an ideal world, each one of us would agree with one another. We wouldn’t have painful arguments or conflicts that would later create more damaging issues. We would be in harmonious circumstances, happily going on our own ways.

Realistically speaking, this ideology is impossible to achieve. Whenever we force each other to agree with one another, the more we grow farther apart.

This idyllic expectation of sunshine and rainbows is crushing collaboration. Instead of being the messy back-and-forth process it naturally is, we force it to become harmonious. We expect everyone to concur and be supportive towards everyone yet this constant desire hinders partnerships in fulfilling its promises of greater innovation and improved risk moderation. At its universal form, collaboration coincides with healthy conflict.

A large majority of us have been taught to see collaboration and conflict as two different things.  The common narrative for teams include perfect synchronization and tight formation. As players gathered in one team, you should “all be in the same boat” and to be a good member, you must “row in the same direction” but contrary to popular belief, these dreamy visions of what a team should be is what weakens them.

Nothing is perfect. In collaboration, tension, disagreement and conflict is needed in order to improve the value of an idea. It helps expose the risk of a plan and leads to an enriched trust among the participants.

It’s high time that managements change their mindsets towards conflict. They should start letting go of the idea that it is destructive and embrace its potential to be productive. Moving beyond clichés and daydreams, the activity of collaboration becomes excessive if you only resort to agreeing. American writer and political commentator Walter Lippmann did say, “Where all think alike, no one thinks very much.” In order to make the most out of it, divergence is needed before convergence.

But much to our dismay, our antipathy towards discords is embedded so deep into our thoughts that it takes a great deal of effort to encourage even the most modest disagreements. Though there are certain steps that teams can take in order to develop productive friction when it’s needed.

First, it’s important for teams to discuss and recognize the different roles of each member and emphasize what each position brings to the project.  Explain how they each contribute to different agendas. Having good composition allows groups to normalize the tension collaboration naturally brings. Fighting for the best solution possible becomes a norm and gives people a new perspective on disagreement with colleagues.

Secondly, the use of personality or style assessment tools helps figure out the differences in each individual. Other than that of stemming from their respective jobs, each member will have a different view on things depending on their personalities. This would help you foresee any personality related conflict that could arise.

Lastly, in order to normalize and encourage productive conflict, teams should establish sets of ground rules around discord. Figure out behaviors that create positive contributions and separate those that detract from it. It’s important to paint a clear picture of what is, and is not, acceptable behavior to the rest of the team.

It also helps to define processes so that you will have a more-frequent or more-effective conflict.

Admittedly, it’s not enough to simply just follow the aforementioned techniques. Changing people’s mindset towards conflict and disagreement goes beyond. Some teams even go as far as joining coworking spaces to gain brand new perspective. These shared offices take pride in the great communities they create. Its open layout encourages open communication and the diversity of its members shows that there is beauty in each one’s differences.

So you’ve recently joined your very first coworking space! You’ve gotten to know the work area – where the private offices are, the café and snack bar, as well as the usual schedule of the daily pool tournament. Despite of this, there’s one more thing left to do now that you’ve settled down; making friends.

We’ve all been in the awkward situation of being the new person – a fish out of water to simply put. Usually taking place at networking events, industry conferences, charity events, dinner parties, and other social-professional circumstances, we are often forced to build our rapport quickly. Like any other human being, we attempt breaking the silence by asking:

“So, what do you do?”

It’s a pretty standard question, we think to ourselves. A large majority of us – if not, I think almost everyone – believes that talking about one’s respective work is one of the best way to build a connection with someone we recently met. But in reality, it’s actually the opposite – in fact, it’s best to avoid this exact topic.

According to experts from network science and psychology, humans tend to seek out relationships that has more than one context for connecting with another person. Known as multiplex ties among sociologist, these are connections that has overlapping roles or affiliations from different social contexts. For example, if a coworker happens to live in the same condominium as you or you both go to the same gyms, it means that you share a multiplex tie.

Experts believe that the reason we prefer these kinds of connections is because of the ideology that relationships built on multiplex ties tend to be richer, more trustworthy, and longer lasting. This can be observed in our daily lives: those coworkers who also happen to be actual friends is far more likely to be with you should one of you decide to change careers. This goes the other way too, those who have at least one actual friend at work are prone to liking their jobs more.

Going back to the question “What do you do?” why shouldn’t we use this as an opener?

Say you’re already attending a work-related gathering or simply meeting a new individual under the context of work, it quickly sets a boundary in the conversation that he or she is simply a “work” contact. Though yes, there’s a possibility of discovering another commonality between the two of you but the chance of the conversation heading towards the aforementioned direction is slim to none.

So instead, consider starting with questions that are deliberately non-work related. Trust that the context of the conversation will eventually go back to work-related topics.

Here are some questions that you can use to start conversations with and will hopefully help you discover more commonalties and even gain you a new friend:

This question opens up a wide range of possible answers. In addition to this, it gives the person the freedom to talk about work, kids, or simply anything that excites them.

This works for the same reason mentioned earlier but is far more forward-looking than backward looking. This gives the person a bigger set of possible answers.

Similar to the aforementioned two questions but is more backward-looking than forward. Regardless, it’s once again an open-ended question that gives others plentiful of answers to choose from.

Though this question dives into one’s backgrounds, it’s a much less assertive than asking where they came from. It allows them to answer with simple details of their childhood or engage the story of how they got where they are and what they’re doing.

As expected, this steers the discussion from work – unless of course they are lucky enough land a job that they’d be doing for fun. Yet in the end, it’s the type of question that will stir non-work answers.

These examples of open-ended questions help create multiplex ties in relationship – a concept that coworking spaces often cultivate. These shared offices are designed to create new connections in different circumstances and environments.

An average person’s ideal career life would kick start from getting that job they have been dreaming of. After that, they would work hard enough to keep it – or even, master it – so that in the future, they can relax and take the much needed break they deserve. Yet as the time passes by, instead of flying in business-class airplanes to luxurious cities, those who have “made it” seem to be working more and more hours than they did before. Missing meals, coming in early and staying in late.

It makes people wonder, shouldn’t successful people be enjoying the fruit of all the hard work and labor they have invested instead of working even more? University of London Professor of Management of Professional Service Firms, Laura Empson, helps us understand the factors that drive employees to overwork themselves.

The stories of managers and other administrative positions working long hours have become common recently. It has become a norm for a majority of us to overwork ourselves despite of the knowledge that it’s bad for both our mental and physical health.

Truthfully speaking, things weren’t like this before. Way back, white-collar workers would work as hard as they could at the beginning of their career in order for them to earn the right to be receive rewards later on. All of their perseverance would result to a secured tenure and what could possibly be a series of senior positions.

Once you’ve won first place in the competition, you would become a partner. And partnerships would mean autonomy and flexibility in when to work as well as what to work on.

But contrary to popular belief, this tradition has long been erased in the culture of organizations. Seniors are working harder than ever and the rest of the firm simply follows.

Empson said in a statement from a Harvard Business Review article that the tendency of overworking one’s self is framed by a compound combination of factors such as profession, organization and themselves. According to her research, at the heart of it is a professional’s insecurity. Employees in general, have anxiety peaks whenever contemplating about when work is actually done, how their respective management perceives its people, and most importantly, what counts as hard work. This indefinite knowledge regarding work delivery causes anxiety attacks since there’s no concrete way of telling when the aforementioned tasks is actually completed.

Professionals are constantly out to reassure their employers that they are worth the high salary they are being paid for and that they are far more valuable than their closest colleague. And when working outside the regular hours and staying late a few days a week starts to become so familiar its normal. Overworking goes unnoticed and we find ourselves taking more responsibilities in order to fulfill the need to “contribute efficiently” to the company.

But it’s not just the inherent self-doubt of employees causing this phenomenon. Organizational pressures also contributes to it so much so that even the most established members of the workforce feel the need to stay in late.

Empson’s research revealed that some firms actually hire insecure overachievers on purpose for their incredible ambitiousness and motivation. These are the kind of self-disciplined people pursuing elite positions. The constant need for validation is what drives them work harder in order to prove themselves worthy.

She notes that though it can be rewarding and exhilarating, it’s important to consider how this work related anxiety affects your daily living. It’s vital that we acknowledge how we are driving ourselves – as well as our staff – too hard. Empson emphasizes that there is a  need to learn how to help your team and that it’s important to take a step back when things are getting out of hand.

Slowly but surely, administrators and other heads of organizations are recognizing the said phenomenon. Small steps are being implemented to slowly incorporate wellness breaks into their respective cultures.

And one of the most common solutions is transferring teams into coworking spaces.

The promise of a better work-life balance and a supportive community is just a sampler of what the shared offices can offer. Freelancers, startups, and now, large companies are joining the movement in hopes of finding that spark in doing what they love. With a diverse group of people all aiming to collaborate and support one another, individuals start to feel less and less insecure about their work. Moreover, it provides them a brand new security that the hours they are already putting in is enough to be classified as hard work.

Learn more about how a change in surrounding can lessen over working by booking a tour with us today!

Networking events – we’ve all probably attended one or if not, have been invited to at some point of our life. It’s one of those initially promising gatherings that are undeniably awkward in nature. Most attendees would dress up and make the effort of going in the hopes that they’ll meet new contacts that could be of help later on in their career. Yet truthfully speaking, these same individuals would end up in a corner, drinking and chatting with someone they already knew.

One would assume that introverts would probably despise such events but much to the surprise of everyone, even extroverts carry indifferent views towards them. It’s not just reserved peers who come home feeling that they’ve wasted their time, outgoing attendees would often wonder why they never made the most of their day at these events.

Keynote speaker and best-selling author David Burkus reassures professionals that there’s nothing wrong with them. The event itself is the one that’s actually failing.

After reviewing dozens of studies on networking events in preparation for his book Friend of a Friend” Understanding the Hidden Networks That Can Transform Your Life and Your Career”, Burkus wrote in a Harvard Business Review article that there’s an overall implication that the aforementioned gatherings don’t actually live up to their name. A majority of us resorts to staying inside of our own comfort zones – talking to colleagues present or people we deem similar to us – in situations that require us to meet new people. The idea of networking events is doomed by its very design alone.

A notable study conducted by two Columbia Business School professors presented that even the well-intentioned professionals fail to meet enough new people to justify the affectivity of system. It became clear to them that our comfort zones can be a little too inviting.

So how do we avoid the magnetic pull of staying inside our bubble? Simply, stop trying.

Weird as it seems, one of the best strategies is to actually stop trying to meet new people.

If we want to make new connections with diverse individuals, we must shift our focus from the relationship itself to activities that you can participate in. Sociologist and network scientist Brian Uzzi says that meaningful networks aren’t made through casual interactions. Rather, they thrive in high-stake activities that allows people to connect in deeper ways.

The one flaw with networking events is that it carries no other goal than to get people into conversations. Without a bigger purpose, there’s little to no incentive for individuals to move beyond activities that make them comfortable.

The higher the stakes, the more we push further to meet and connect with more diverse groups.

The well-known movement of shared offices and coworking spaces stands as living proof that spontaneous interactions create better connections.

Priding itself in authentic communities, its open layout have allowed members to casually interact and socialize with one another. Its gathering events allows them to form deeper connections than those that root from networking events.

Talk to us today and we’ll help you build stronger relationships while having fun!